Should You Get A Divorce After an Affair?
Blog / 06/26/2012

Should You Get A Divorce After an Affair? By Kajay Williams   An affair can feel like the most devastating blow to a relationship for many, many reasons. The betrayed spouse will feel all sorts of negative emotions following the discovery of an affair, and this raw, painful emotion can make them feel like the only way out is a divorce. After all, their spouse hurt them in one of the worst ways possible. For some individuals who are feeling nothing but negative emotion, they want to hurt their spouse back by taking away their love forever – and the easiest way to do this is through a divorce. However, a life-changing decision such as a divorce shouldn’t be borne out of painful emotions. It should be thought through rationally when the aftermath of the affair has started to settle – and then, and only then can you make the decision. Wait for the Dust to Settle Before you can even begin to think about divorcing your spouse, you need to wait for the dust to settle on the discovery of the affair – and you need to wait for your emotions to settle down too. The discovery of an…

How Cheating Husbands Wives Use Phones & Computers To Communicate
Blog / 06/23/2012

Digital Betrayal: How Cheating Husbands & Wives Use Phones & Computers To Communicate   These days it’s easier than ever to communicate with people – we’ve got high-speed internet connections (wireless & otherwise), mobile phones, pagers, fax machines. We can talk at the touch of a button, across cities, countries, the entire world. Furthermore, communication through these digital protocols is almost instant, fairly cheap and – if you want it to be – completely private and hidden. While advancements in digital communication are, on the whole, a great thing, they do have their down sides. One disadvantage is that cheating husbands, wives (or, for that matter, girlfriends or boyfriends) can communicate with their private lovers away from the prying eyes and ears of their trusting partners. It happens every day: thousands upon thousands of text messages are sent by disloyal men and women to those they’re sleeping with behind their real partners’ backs. Back in the day, the only way a guy or girl could arrange a clandestine meeting would be over a hard-line (either a house phone or a payphone). That meant the cheater would either have to make risky calls from the home of their unsuspecting spouses, or…

How to Avoid Workplace Infidelity During Company Holiday Party
Blog / 06/21/2012

How to Avoid Workplace Infidelity During the Company Holiday Party By Kajay Williams   It’s very common for an extra-marital affair to start at the office – after all, the straying spouse can be a completely different person than they are at home and there is plenty of opportunity to meet new potential partners. The company holiday party is apparently one of the most common places for an affair to start – one study found that affairs are more likely to start at the company holiday party than at any other time of year, while another estimates that around 54% of holiday party-goers will get intimate with another co-worker at the party. If you suspect that your spouse is involved in an affair – or if you want to prevent an affair – it’s important that you accompany your spouse to their company holiday party. Insist on going to the party Many betrayed spouses say that their straying spouse told them numerous lies about the company holiday party – including the implementation of a “no-spouse” rule by their company, that the company was not having a holiday party and that they were not attending the office party but were instead…

What Are the Stumbling Blocks to Ending the Affair?
Blog / 06/17/2012

What Are the Stumbling Blocks to Ending the Affair? By Kajay Williams   Following the discovery of an affair, the straying spouse is left with two clear choices; to heal their relationship with their spouse and leave the affair partner, or to end their relationship with their spouse and move forwards in a relationship with the affair partner. More often than not, the choice between the spouse and the affair partner is more difficult than the straying spouse may choose to believe – and although they may think that they want to move forward in healing their relationship, they may find it more difficult than imagined to sever ties with their affair partner. Here are some common stumbling blocks to ending the affair. Does my spouse want to take me back? In most cases, an affair destroys the trust between a straying spouse and their spouse. The betrayed spouse wonders if they can ever trust their partner again and if there is any hope for the future. Although the betrayed spouse may have every intention of working on the marriage and moving on, with time, the straying spouse may see this period of uncertainty as their spouse being unsure of…

How to End Your Spouse’s Affair
Blog / 06/05/2012

How to End Your Spouse’s Affair By Kajay Williams The betrayed spouse can feel completely and utterly powerless after the discovery of an affair. They hope that their spouse ends the relationship with their affair partner – but they feel like there is little else that they can do. The betrayed spouse may feel like they are unable to move forward until they are completely sure that the affair is over – and what better way to make sure that the affair is over than ending it yourself, right? Wrong – the only way to end your spouse’s affair is to nudge them into ending it. No matter how much you might want to end it yourself, inevitably, your spouse will just feel angry that you went behind their back to end their relationship. Don’t Let Your Emotions Get the Better of You When the betrayed spouse first discovers an affair, their first reaction – or one of their first reactions – is likely to be anger. Anger at how they have been betrayed and anger that their spouse was so willing to potentially destroy their relationship in favour of a relationship with someone else. This is entirely normal –…

8 Signs of a Cheating Boyfriend
Blog / 06/04/2012

8 Signs of a Cheating Boyfriend By Kajay Williams   Some ladies — especially those who have been cheated on by their one-time boyfriends — would tell you that trust is much more important in a relationship than love. In any event, loss of one’s trust can easily erode the love in any relationship. Loss of one’s trust does not even mean catching your boyfriend red-handed. A mere whisper of a doubt in the faithfulness of your partner can undermine whatever security you feel in your relationship. So before the doubt gnaws at you any further, read on to find out exactly the signs of a cheating boyfriend. 1. Go back to the root cause of your nagging thoughts. Why do you have this disconcerting feeling that your boyfriend is cheating on you? Did some likely evidence jump at you at an unguarded moment such as another woman’s perfume? A lipstick smear? An errant text message? At this early stage, an outright confrontation may not be the best idea. But that doesn’t mean you’ll keep quiet about this. A little digging may bring out the next sign – if your boyfriend is indeed cheating on you. 2. Confront your boyfriend…

7 Signs Of A Cheating Girlfriend
Blog / 05/23/2012

7 Signs Of A Cheating Girlfriend By Kajay Williams   We can often take guys at face value – they rarely have the cunning and subtlety of women who often mean more than what they say. That is why on the aspect of cheating, it would seem more difficult to catch an unfaithful girlfriend than to spot an errant boyfriend. Some people might even be surprise to learn that girls cheat. Well they do, and cheating girlfriends are not so uncommon nowadays. So how do you know if your girlfriend is cheating on you? 1. Is she communicating with you? Women are all about communicating – not just talking but having a meaningful conversation. You may not have noticed the distinction in the past but if you are starting to suspect your girlfriend to be cheating, you better listen up. Recall how she used to talk to you – did she make plans that include you? Does she reveal her feelings about the tidbits she shared with you? Does she seem interested in what you tell her? Compared that with how she talks to you now. If she seems less interested in that meaningful conversation, try and coax it out…

Can You Save A Marriage Alone?
Blog / 05/17/2012

Can You Save A Marriage Alone?   The unfortunate question asked by the plenty of people. Today, many couples are facing some or the other problems in their married life. The first few years of married life are cheerful, but after some years, problems may arise due to conflicts along with bitterness and some misunderstanding. Generally, nobody directly thinks of breaking a marriage as it is hurting to both the partners. Every couple tries to find out some ways to resolve the problems in their married life and save a marriage. Once you agree that there are some problems in your married life, you may need to think and find the reasons why. Off-course, it will be just like a one-way traffic and it is quiet difficult that you alone should try to improve your relations. Your partner should equally respond to your efforts to save your marriage. However, you must make some efforts to find out the problems in your married life and develop some qualities within you to maintain better relationships. The first step you may need to take in order to save your marriage is to bring back the spark in your relationship again. It is very…

How to Know Your Spouse’s Affair Is Truly Over
Blog / 05/14/2012

How to Know Your Spouse’s Affair Is Truly Over By Kajay Williams   It can be incredibly difficult to weather the storm of an affair, and if your relationship manages to survive the deluge, it can take a long, long time before things get back to normal. One of the most difficult aspects of rebuilding a relationship following an affair is that the betrayed spouse does not truly know that their spouse’s affair is over. Oftentimes, there is a period of time between the discovery of the affair and the actual ending of the affair, and during this time, the straying spouse will often say that the affair is over – even though it is not. The signs mentioned below may indicate that your spouse’s affair is truly over, meaning that you can truly start to move on in your life and in your relationship. Grief/depression about the ending of the affair Although this may sound like a strange sign that your spouse’s affair is over, if they show some grief or seem upset about the end of the affair, it could well indicate that it is well and truly over. Although it can be incredibly difficult to see your…

Barriers to Rebuilding Your Marriage After the Affair
Blog / 05/02/2012

What Are the Barriers to Rebuilding Your Marriage After the Affair? By Kajay Williams   Discovery of an affair is incredibly tough on any marriage, and even if both partners are willing to put the time and effort into rebuilding their marriage, it could still be incredibly difficult to fully repair the relationship. There are a number of barriers and stumbling blocks that may have to be navigated in order to rebuild the relationship. Here are a few common barriers to rebuilding your marriage after the affair and how to overcome them. The straying spouse is unsure of their spouse’s love Oftentimes, the straying spouse may choose to remain in contact with their lover as they are unsure of whether or not their spouse has forgiven them or whether or not their spouse still loves them. Because they are unsure of their spouse’s love, they might choose to hang on to the contact with their lover to have a type of “insurance policy”. They might still text and email their lover, and even if the betrayed spouse does not know about their spouse’s ongoing contact with their lover, they will instinctively know that there is something not quite right in…