4 Common Reasons Why People Cheat
By Kajay Williams
We all know that people cheat – but why? What is it that drives people to actually stray from their partners?
Infidelity is so complex and confusing because people even in the most prestigious positions have destroyed their careers and family by indulging in affairs.
Research indicates people have affairs even when they report they are happy in their marriage. In this article, let’s look at a few reasons why people cheat.
1. Oxytocin & Arginine Vasopressin vs Testosterone
Part of the answer lies in science. Research has shown us that we possess two hormones that are designed to make us monogamous, oxytocin and arginine vasopressin. Oxytocin is a “happy hormone” that is released in both males and females through touch, sex and other positive social signals, which helps couples to bond in pairs. Arginine vasopressin is a hormone that stimulates male bonding and guarding of offspring – another hugely important factor in bonding and creating a family. But what counteracts this is testosterone – testosterone is associated with libido, as well as high quality genes, which attract women.
Testosterone fights against oxytocin and arginine vasopressin, especially in situations where testosterone levels naturally rise, such as when you win a competition or succeed over a situation or a person. When testosterone levels rise, men are more likely to cheat.
2. Lack of sexual satisfaction
Moving away from science, there are a number of motivating factors for cheating – for both men and women. A recent survey performed on men and women who were interested in extra-marital affairs by Julia Omarzu showed that there were a number of key reasons for wanting to engage in an affair or commit infidelity – and you might not be surprised to find out that the main reason cited for infidelity was lack of sexual satisfaction.
Lack of sexual satisfaction in a relationship could drive men and women to have an affair, perhaps because they want to seek intimacy from elsewhere, or simply because they just want to have more sex, or more enjoyable sex.
3. Lack of emotional intimacy
Lack of emotional intimacy in a relationship was almost as important a factor in initiating an affair, or cheating on a partner, as lack of sexual satisfaction. If an individual feels as though they are not able to confide in their partner, or if they are unable to connect with them, it may lead them to seek emotional intimacy elsewhere.
Other participants in the study stated that they were seeking emotional validation from outside of their relationship when cheating, whilst others stated that they simply wanted to have more sexual encounters than they were currently having.
4. Other reasons
Other, less frequent reasons for engaging in infidelity were; falling out of love with a partner, wanting to seek revenge on a partner, wanting to try a new experience and falling in love with someone other than their partner. However, it was rare for an individual to cheat on their partner because they had fallen out of love with them or in love with someone else, and much more common for them to cheat due to problems with their sex life or their emotional well-being.
In general, people tend to cheat because they are lacking something in their life – they are looking for fulfillment outside of a relationship, or trying to fix their feelings by seeking intimacy or sexual satisfaction from elsewhere, instead of looking inwards at their own feelings and their own relationship.
What To Do If Your Partner Is Having An Affair?
Time To Act: There is hope.
An affair may be the best thing to happen to a marriage or relationship.
Contrary to popular belief, experts say that many couples survive infidelity and are able to rebuild a stronger, better and more fulfilling marriage after the betrayal.
Whether you suspect your partner or spouse is cheating on you or whether you have just discovered your spouse’s affair or whether you are wondering if you want to save your marriage or opt for separation after an affair or whether you want to redefine the boundaries of your relationship or marriage to make sure you and your partner are on the same page, I can help you.
CLICK on the link below to learn more.